Deep Sorrow

Seeing savarkar’s father accompanying the doctor outside the aiims hospital, didn’t strike me with awe. I had received the news of his passing away an hour back, it didn’t make me feel sad either. I was secretly happy, for my friend’s suffering had come to an end. 35 days in comma. Lakhs spent as “hope” slyly smiled on their expectations from her.

I fear the lord. I dare not say a word against his divinity, or he might kick my butt in a similar way, I need to fear him, I fail to love him. My emotions seem to have flushed down the drain, I have stopped feeling.

The Buffer theory

Momentum is mass*velocity, Whenever we start solving the mass of our problems quickly, we are said to gain momentum. Be it gaining momentum in our preparations of an exam, or wrapping up unfinished work before going on a long vacation.The Buffer theory states that,
 momentum is a state of mind, a feeling or a certain level of confidence, which the mind has the ability to document in a subconscious buffer. In case we face a situation in the future, the mind has the ability to connect to this buffer of confidence and get into the same level of momentum.
some gyan eh!!. It works at times.

The Giver

When I met the ocean. It roared to me from , behind the walls of the hotel.

I felt as if I was about to be presented before something, or rather someone grand and sacred. Like a king summoning an unknown visitor.I found myself humbled as I admired it from a distance.Huge waves , towered and slapped the rocks with a thunder!! It was bewildering to have imagined the phrase "...a sea of emotions..."(What a magnanimous thing to possess and more to control)...which was now growing inside me.I reluctantly stepped towards the shore, aware of the fact that I was present in front of royalty.
The waves , hit my feet with a gentle force,as if it was the grand sea welcoming the unknown visitor to his territory. It was a good omen. I stood before one of almighty's most  majestic creations ,the sea.
Like an old wise friend he spoke to me, in a deep and strong  voice....
"Calm down my friend...Just calm down.. whroooosh the waves splashed....
"I'm the final destination of unknown rivers, who travel a thousand mile to surrender to me..." whroosh the waves splashed at my feet again.....
"I accept them as they are (their dirt and minerals)..equally and unconditionally...."
For a  moment , I felt like the sea. A similar feeling  we get, when we help someone in need. A feeling that bounds the infinite meaninglessness of life....the feeling of a giver.

The Midas touch

The path is dark, wilderness all around…

A  distance barking dog seems to frown.

The mind lost in qualms, aghast. ……………When it hears a sublime start(of a guitar).

A tune it is that I hold on to…………A jingle of the rock guitar,

Coming from anonymous fingers………… travelling to unknown hearts.

The song has no lyrics, but it whispers wisdom to my soul.

Forming a sync with the thoughts unknown.

Adieus

I quit….for the views were too skewed to wonder….

I quit….for the holy cross bled with thunder ….

The “circum” of the “stances” pushed me to a bottleneck…

Causing great damage and utter wreck….

Thy shalt not mourn old friend of mine…

For the situation here is a bit sublime…..

Farewell!! Fellowmen…my last goodbyes….

Signing off, with a heavy heart and deep sighs.


* PS: this poem is dedicated to Headstrong and my colleagues there.

Follow thy heart...

 “Follow your heart”, is what the final message of all the wisdom in the world is.

Steve Jobs did it. “Stay hungry, Stay foolish” was one of his favorite quotes. Amir Khan is doing it, realizing that he is gifted with success in a field, whereby he can influence a large section of people, coming up with a show that addresses real life problems to the very root. Subhash Chandra Bose did it, when he refused to join the Indian Civil services and dedicating his entire life to the Indian freedom struggle, the history of which does not do justice to his contributions.

As I grow older, I feel the need of following my heart all the more. It’s important for me to do what I really want to do. Of course, it certainly doesn’t mean hurting anyone, (people are becoming less important for me by the day , so I have a confined social circle i.e. small bunch of people who are worth compromising oneself with).

Recently I completed 5000kms of biking. I observed a growing instinct inside me. Being new to the NCR, I’m not aware of all the roads that connect my office to my flat in delhi. Getting stuck in the traffic is the last thing you would want, but it is inevitable in the evenings. The only motivation that keeps me going through the traffic is that, it is the shortest possible distance to my flat. There have been certain days , that out of sheer frustration , I decided to take “the road less travelled”, and it has always been a rewarding experience to find a new route . I try applying the principle of free will to the path that lies ahead of me(while I’m on my bike trying to find a new way). I go by my instinct on every turn. It helps me connect to myself, there are places which are jammed, but I feel like getting inside it’s all instinctive.

This has become a small piece of exercise which I implicitly practice at-least once in 20 days. Like any newbie, I’m nervous and unsure of myself. It’s important to have a good acquaintance with such mental state. There might be graver situations in life, but the feeling of fear and doubt are the same, may be more intense. So I utilize , this exercise to not only get acquainted with such a mental state, but also to help myself come out of it. All it requires is a bit of enthusiasm.

The Travel Blog.

Mountains, valleys, rivers and me….on my bike I drove with thee…
Diving in the abyss, zooming on the highways …..
Stopping on the random shop and the lonely byways (to pee) …
A traveler resides in my soul…which constantly searches for new goals…
where heart meets the head....in harmony with the rest
it swings, it whirls like the movie black pearl...
the pirates,the pistols and the buzzing bee......I'm the etrnal traveler...
of an eternal me.

Delhi is to north, what Bangalore is to south. In terms of location, both these cities lie almost on the same longitude. While Bangalore is a metro, centrally located to South India, same goes for Delhi.

While staying in Delhi, one could plan short car/bike trips to the following places.

West- The Lands of Rajasthan,Gujrat and Haryana lie to the west of Delhi. A weekend trip to Jaipur would be so much fun. Places like Dwarka,Ahemdabad,Jodhpur,Upaidpur,Jaiselmer can be covered over a short vacation. The highways are known to be broad and filled with quality dhabas and eat outs throughout.

South- Nothing much in the South that I have heard of apart from the wonderful six way highway through the Aravalis, connecting Delhi through Faridabad to Chandigarh.

East- Lot many places to explore east of Delhi. Starting from Haradwar, Dehradun,Mussorie, Corbet National Park, which revolves around the tarai region of the river kosi, The eastern terrain extends to Lucknow and Kanpur for an overnight drive. There is two way connectivity. First one being through the legendary grant trunk road, which passes through cities of Aligarh and bareily to reach luck now. But I will not advise this route , since most of the road is broken by heavy trucks and is Jammed most of the times. A surer alternative is the brand new six lane Yamuna Expressway, that starts from Greater Noida, runs parallel to the Yamuna river and ends up in Agra. Imagine spending an ideal weekend by a young couple, celebrating their brand new car on a smooth drive to the adobe of Romance. A definite thing on my bucket list. Another route would be through Mathura,Agra,Etawa,Kanpr,Lucknow. The Highway is in a very good condition, just for the sole reason of being under Mulayam Singh Yadav’s constituency who made sure that roads in his area were good.

Finally North- There are lot many places to visit, North of Delhi. Starting off from Himachal Pradesh, which happens to be one of the most beautiful regions of the country. Mountains here one of the highest and home to places like Shimla and Manali. The land of Punjab and J&K lie beyond this. Places like Amritsar,Kashmir,Leh,Jammu and Chandigarh are some not be missed by the travel freaks.

Being in delhi also gives you a chance to plan a trip to the Holy Vaishno Devi temple and Ajmer Sharif shrine.Not to forget, Delhi itself is home to so many national museums and monuments. As a student , I had explored the region east of delhi extensively, but as for the other places around delhi, the Juice is definitely worth the squeeze J

The High Definition Conscience

I had been watching “Slumdog Millionaire” on my new airtel HD and it was an experience of its kind. Even the minutest boards in the background were visible and the movie made a whole lot of newer sense. But this blog is not about the techno gadgets and the happiness it brings along. It is about something in the movie which I saw that hit me out like a thunder bolt, and what they have shown does happen in reality.


Three orphan kids, clinging to the cliff of survival in the slums of Mumbai are wooed by a couple of “men” as people doing social work for orphans and take them to children’s home. These kids are treated well there, but little do they know that they are being trained for begging and most of their peers shall be operated to blind and lame kids. What barbarism!! and sadly many such abominable things exist, in our utopian society.

It’s time to question ourselves, what’s the point being so ambitious in life. What’s the point running after promotions? , being career oriented? Earning big money. Where is basic humanity in the society we live in , or it just features in the form of NGOs run by the so called youth who want to improve their SOPs while they apply for Harvard and Cornell. What a bunch of fucking hypocrites!

In the midst of all these chaos, there are examples who have done it. Shown us the way of acting like humans.

1. Headstrong –the company I work for contributes INR50 monthly from every employee’s monthly salary for the Kargil relief Fund. This is a company which is defined by dynamic leadership and I saw many scenarios here which give me all the more reason of being with it for a long time.

2. Rajeev Gandhi Cancer Hospital, New Delhi –An oasis in the desert. If you pay for the medicines in cash here, you get 21% discount. Can you imagine what getting a 21% discount on a INR 1 lakh chemo injection would mean to a poor person.

3. Satyamev Jayate- A purely selfless effort by Aamir khan. Hats Off to him.

These were some scenarios, I saw of late, of people, who are dedicated to serve humanity. Imagine the clarity of conscience they enjoy, of being able to do such things rather than planning their application for a B-school. I wonder, if I could enjoy an HD version of my conscience ever.

A Beautiful Night

This is a classical "page from the past". I happened to stumble upon this un-finished article which I had written on March 23rd 2011. It was kept hidden in a remote folder of my computer. I decided to post the unfinished random thoughts as they were....

"It’s a beautiful night, a couple of days  ago we had the supermoon, ironically after many days there is no light in my room. I could see the all-out bulb flickering against the low voltage and finally fading into darkness.

But the night has something magical about itself. A feeling of calmness and security covers me like a small boy pulling a fur coat from his closet, in the eastern European winter and wrapping it around looks outside, at the camp-fire lit by his friends, feeling the warmth through the glass window.

After a long time, I feel like writing about health and happiness. Life and well being, freedom and fun.

These are good times, it’s a beautiful night...."

and I wrote the following lines...

Her eyes had a glitter, of a free soul…

Shrinking while she grinned with the dimpled role……..

Her laughter,her expressions,her scent and her hair…….synced like the piano, playing a dream (which is) rare……

 she jumps and runs ,like a doe on a ramp…

Running through the forest, in the wild calm…..

I follow her through the woods, across the highs and lows…

into the deep mountains and seas which roar……….

But mountains are too high and seas are filled with sharks,

Climbing and swimming them in poetry ,is like scratching your head for a better line :D

“La Belle dame sans Merci: is what Mr.Keats said, after his pursuit of the rampant doe….